I finally have a home for all the random stories I email people!

(Also I'm too lazy to write a fresh post for the inauguration of my blog lifestyle)

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The Drive to Work takes 40 Minutes – The Scars Stay for Life

Now I’m an animal lover. That’s not to say, however, that animals feel the same way about me. An extensive lineage of family pets has clearly indicated that members of the animal kingdom would rather perish than be subjugated to me. But being an animal lover does give me license to go ‘Awww’ at cute puppies and be affronted by people who tie dogs outside shopping centres and be …ah… perplexed by the odd happenings in the nearby dog park. This morning as I drove past I saw a sweet little old lady walking through the park with her two enormous cattle dogs (obviously she lives in the pastoral side of our sweet suburban neighbourhood). She was carrying one of those ball throwing devices designed to keep you an arms length away from slobber, one wonders why the designers haven’t extended this concept to the pooper-scooper because that is infinitely more disgusting than saliva, but hey… As I drove past I could see her throwing tennis balls to the two dogs. One of them was pelting across the field, jumping, catching…generally making the scene look like something out an osteoporosis supplement ad starring Sigrid Thornton. But wait? Where is the other dog?!? I could see the old lady throwing tennis balls towards a tree… as I drove past there is the dog. Hunched over, licking its bits and being bombarded with tennis balls to the spine. I wonder whether she was seriously trying to get the dog to play with her or if she was just trying to curb its public displays of deviant behaviour.

Now this needs no explanation of why this was -

a) bizarre

b) stupid

c) offensive

I’ll set the scene – Long line of cars waiting to turn at a red arrow, hot day, cranky people late for work. In front of me is a small, girly hatchback covered in stickers that gives the impression that the owner is a very, very bad girl who likes Frangipanis and Tinkerbell…ooh beware! The door opens, a little blonde head pops out and proceeds to file an offending nail on the curb. Oh. My. God. I don’t think I need to say anything else.